PORN: The depiction of explicit sexual subject matter for the purposes of sexual excitement.
We are all sexual beings. If I describe a moment of pure, unadulterated excitement am I talking PORN?
The other day I caught my unsuspecting husband in the grocery store. I turned the corner and from the far end of the aisle saw a handsome, unassuming, calm, confident, man perusing the shelves in search of low calorie, carbonated beverages. Even before I realized who he was, I was thoroughly aroused.
Was I watching Porn?
Am I describing Porn?
Not yet, what about now…
He grabbed a 2 liter bottle of diet Mountain Dew and held it firmly in his hands. It had his full attention, just as I did right before dawn, under the coolness of freshly washed satin sheets.
Is this too graphic? Is anyone offended? Want more?……
He knows me well. He knows my moans, my movements, the impatience of my breath. He’s studied me for more than a decade and yet, his touch is neoteric and oh so erotic, and I am helpless.
Wow……this is fun! The hell with you, now I want more…
He is tender. He takes his time. He wants to please me. I stop thinking. He whispers….I love you and I am his, forever.
OH Crap…too romantic..
His thrust is deliberate. My tongue circles the sweat that drips from his brow and I pull him closer. I fight to keep my eyes open. I want to absorb every moment, see the pleasure of his stare. I could live like this forever.
My hand caresses the firm line of his jaw, strokes his back, then rests on top of his well formed buttocks. With both hands I force him closer. I want more of him inside….
Wow……censor yourself Shannon!!!
No, this is my blog and I’ll do as I damn well please!
Well….I’ll do as much as I can without checking the Adult Content box.
I consider gum smacking inappropriate behavior. So does a dear friend of mine. I know this because she brought it to someones attention at a recent outing we were on.
Four women in a car. I am driving. My dear friend is to my side. Two of her friends are in the back. One is silent the other is smacking her gum. Loudly
My dear friend warns her that it is offensive. She apologizes. The conversation continues. I am in entertainment mode.
It’s Sunday and we are out and about. I’m happy to spend time with my dear friend but I’m missing my time at home. After all, it is Sunday and everyone knows I watch porn at 4:00 on Sundays.
I love the way it sounds. Porn …..at Four….. on Sundays.
It started off as a joke and then quickly evolved into fun.
We watch all sorts of adult erotica. Jenna Jameson is by far my favorite porn star. I love that I have a favorite porn star. I wonder if she's on facebook?
We watch old porn, French porn, Japanese porn.
The Asian porn we’ve seen is really nothing like American porn. There is no nudity or subtitles for that matter, only high pitched moaning as the camera focuses on a rapidly jerking shadow then climaxes to the soothing sound and sight of a gently flowing stream.
We watch educational porn, romantic porn, hardcore porn. I’m even thinking I might start writing porn.
And because I was in entertainment mode on that fateful Sunday evening, with my dear friend and her friends, I shared my excitement with them.
The following morning I received a call. It was my dear friend. She was offended by my conversation. I had embarrassed her. I felt terrible. I felt utter sadness. And then I wrote about it………
What’s wrong with Porn?
And tell me, is Bird Porn off limits too? You KNOW I love my Bird Porn! Can't get enough of it. And what about nudity in general? or in the arts? If I discuss nudity in public am I being inappropriate? What is obscene? What is off limits? And what is this I hear about the lack of social intercourse in today's society? Especially among our youth.
I’m embarrassed that I embarrassed my dear friend but I’m not embarrassed that I watch porn. And if you are offended by my behavior or my comments please tell me so, in the moment, just as my dear friend told her friend who was “wildly” smacked her gum.
The morning after, with the mist of her disgust still steaming, I was asked if I ever censor myself. The truth is, I’m trying really hard not to.
I have reached a point in my life where I want the world to see me exactly as I am, in full glory, bumps and all. My days of keeping up appearances or impressing people are far behind me. And I couldn’t be more proud of myself.
Hey, want to see my Bird Porn???
Hahahahaaaaa - I love it, Shannon! Please don't ever sensor yourself. If you would like to talk about porn, I'd love to read about it!
ReplyDeleteI used to be deathly afraid of porn, mostly because of social conditioning. I still find that I have limited patience for some of it, unless it holds an interesting story line, but the difference is that I'm not afraid of it any more.
The bird porn was so quick I missed it!!!
love all the stuff you have here!
ReplyDeleteespecially the fotos of me!
hmmm. Are you sure we're related? I guess that's why I'm the country bumpkin relative you try to hide. I like to smack my gum. Do it all the time. And how come my comments must be approved by the blog author? Is that kinda like censorship? Just askin'. You know, I be the introverted country folk :-)
ReplyDeleteBonni, I'd NEVER try to hide you! and I am trying to figure out how not to have to approve the comments. The business of blogging is very new to me. I haven't figured out how to link up the bird porn yet. But sadly, gum smacking and all mouth noises annoy the crap out of me. It's roll over residue from my father :) and I knew marriage no# 1 and 2 were OVER when all of a sudden, I could here them chew. So far, I can only hear Mark slurp his coffee. :)
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteMany moons ago, I broke up with a "boyfriend", because he wore black socks with shorts. I've often considered that my brutal judgement of his fashion sense was somewhat shallow, but now Im feeling much better about myself. Thanks Shannon. Now as to why I've focused on gum chewing in a post about porn, well, that's one that would be best left to the experts.
ReplyDeleteI hear ya Joan! I once broke up with a manfriend because he looked like a clown when he......
ReplyDeleteI was thinking about this story more than I thought about Vonnegut's Chapter 1 of Slaughterhouse which I read the day before.
ReplyDeletemakes you think, I like that! Thanks Mary xo
ReplyDeleteI thought it was very insightful, and with your posing of questions it should get people thinking about what they believe. The one main point that you aren't embarrassed by who you are is very important. A lot of people apparently are, and they loose themselves to that embarrassment. The other main point of wondering why it's ok to reprimand about gum smacking but not porn is excellent. She obviously found it as offensive as the gum, or more so, but didn't say anything. Was it because it was you? Was it because it was the word, Porn, and she couldn't speak it in front of others? Was it because of the two particular people with you, as opposed to a different two? I'd love to know the answer. I chuckled at the comment about social intercourse.
ReplyDeleteLoved the picture! (was that historical porn? lol) Also, can I come to your house at 4pm on Sundays. I like porn. Hell, I'm a single guy - I look at porn. haha We could start a little Porn Club, like a neighborhood book club or mothers' club.
The description of your intimate moment with Mark was superb. You gave it enough to get us into the scene, but held back enough to let our own imagination fill in the visual. I could really feel your emotion and intimacy. May I just say, that kind of moment is what everyone should strive for. I'm glad you two have it. Sexual intimacy is one of the glues in a relationship. I think friendship is what sustains love over the long-term. While sexual intimacy may not be more important, it's just as important and a relationship will die without it.
Don't you wish we knew in our 20s what we know now, with the same wisdom we have now? How much more amazing would our lives have been? It's so much easier to NOT censor now that we're older. I'm relishing that (tempered with the occasional social niceties, of course. LOL)
Oh, and I had to go watch your Bird Porn, again. It's fun. Porn is fun, and fun is good. Bird Porn - it's not just for bird watchers anymore. ;-)
I think you are just beginning to push the limits of what you are capable of. Hold yourself back? Why would you be doing this if you felt you had to conform to any container.... you go Shannon....
ReplyDelete