Tuesday, October 9, 2012

ME and Bobby V





This is NOT a post about baseball.
This is NOT a post about the Boston Red Sox.
This is a post about Bobby Valentine, 
the recently FIRED coach of the Boston Red Sox.


I am NOT a big Red Sox fan.
I am NOT a big baseball fan.

What I am is, NOT a Bobby Valentine fan.

It has NOTHING to do with his career as a baseball player, assistant coach, or his tumultuous first year as the Red Sox coach. It has nothing to do with his bravado, his inability to earn the respect of his players and assistant coaches, his lack of critical thinking skills, or his inability to multitask (cycle and text). This is STRICTLY personal. 

 photo courtesy of Getty

Monkeys are many things - mischievous, gregarious, entertaining, engaging, but what you may not know, is that monkeys have a memory far greater than that of an elephant. Especially, when it's a monkey scorned.

Back in the early 80's, I was hired by "Bobby V" to work at his sports bar in Stamford, Connecticut. I was, as I remember it, the first east coast female bartender. I didn't just tend bar, I made it an art form.  Mind you, this was way before the movie Cocktail. This was before it was acceptable or fashionable for a women to work behind the bar. Hell, women were barely allowed to stand at a bar, unattended by a man. That's how old I am.

As a bartender, I was fast. I was funny. I was strong. I was accurate. I could hold my own against obnoxious drunks.

My style was flamboyant. I exaggerated the grace of the pour. I didn't turn to get a bottle, I twirled towards it. I did a Charo, shoulder shimmy, shimmy, martini shake. I didn't do a lot of glass and bottle tossing (ask any bartender, the last thing you want is broken glass in an ice bin) but I did whip my hair back and forth A LOT. My performance was well received and applause was not uncommon. I did all this with small, unpadded breasts, and without being provocatively dressed.

Bobby sat at the far back corner of the bar for most of my shift. I could feel him watching me. Not in a creepy way, it was more like he was scouting for talent and I knew my skills stood out. I wasn't cocky, but I was confident.

I didn't have the luxury of a bar-back, so I lugged the cases of beer by myself. I lifted 35 (?) gallon tubs of ice to fill the bins. Once, my pristine white tretorn sneakers caught the tip of an uneven rubber floor mat and down I went. Quickly I rolled to my right side, grabbed the closest thing I could find - a freshly laundered stack of bar rags - and jumped back onto my feet. It was the only time I saw Bobby smile.

At the end of my shift he called me into his office.

"You were okay kid," he said, "but your shorts need to be shorter."

It's funny. I remember exactly what I wore that day, even the way I styled my hair. I remember the hush of the crowd when I fell. I remember snacking on onion rings, getting lime juice in my eye, as I quartered them. But I don't remember what was said after ..."your shorts need to be shorter."

Was I fired?
Did I quit?
All I know for certain is that this was my first and last day working for Bobby Valentine.

Due to my limited knowledge of his professional baseball career, I cannot, in all fairness, comment on his ability to lead his team. But what I can say is that as a boss, off the field, what Bobby lacked was depth, class and respect. And that is something I will never forget.


"He who wants a rose must respect the thorn." Persian Proverb


xoMonkeyME


photo courtesy of Getty







32 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Well, he's no Dr. Salzberg, but WHAT AN ASS!!! and damn, that was fun to write. I'd celebrate with a glass of wine if it wasn't for that INTERVENTION episode I watched last night.

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    2. I have found that those damn interventions are a pain in the ass...they usually get in the way of a good hary binge...oh well if they knew how inconvient their "trying to save my life" was they might have waited a day or two;-)

      Reading your writing makes me feel stuff too Shannon :-)

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  2. I like that Green Monkey--ur quote

    "He who wants a rose must respect the thorn." Persian Proverb

    I am gonna add that one to my book of quotes if u don't mind.

    U doing ok kiddo.

    I've been reading ur blogs.

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    Replies
    1. I can't say or I'll spoil my next post. But shhhhh between you and me, I'm fine :)))))

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  3. I am a big baseball fan. I am a big Red Sox fan. I am extremely glad that he was fired. I am also extremely glad that you didn't work more than that first day for him. Good for you kid. Love, Mr. Marbles.

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    1. Ohhhhhhh THANK YOU MR. MARBLES!!! I've got one eye shut reading the comments...worried I'm going to piss off a Red Sox fan (especially you, north and rarekat) Love and a super big HUG to you my friend!

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  4. I know someone who worked for him in baseball and who shares your opinion of the man. Thanks for the story!

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    1. oh I love it! thanks for backin' me up! :)))))))

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  5. And now Boston has yet another reason to hate the man. :)

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    1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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    2. oh Juli, I was guessing you were a red sox fan - I tried to make this a clean, one sided fight, but ..... monkeys don't always play by the rules. It's crazy how I've held onto my distain for the man for all these years. Every mention of him makes me cringe. Writing this was very liberating!

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    3. We support all the NE teams in this house, but individual players are just that. I have many MANY celebrities that I do not like because of their choices regardless of who they play for.

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  6. He who wants a rose must respect the thorn." Persian Proverb...is the story of my life....I do love that rose...ouch....

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    1. yep....... I get it. LOL...... funny how much we have in common!

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  7. I knew one too many Bobby's in my lifetime, wonderful to see one get his comeuppance, wish they all would, but that's what Karma's all about, right?

    You go girl! I mean monkey girl!

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    1. KARMA was the first word out of my mouth when I heard he was FIRED!

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  8. I always love the saying " what goes around comes around"

    Sounds like he deserves it

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    Replies
    1. Liz, I have all these silly little stories that I repeat, especially when drinking. It felt great to write this one.

      Thanks for reading!

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  9. Some things just need to be written. I would call him a pig but they are such cute and smart animals. I would call him an ass but I have two lovable sweet donkeys. So I will just say, Karma....it is such a bitch.

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    1. oh Denise, a friend of mine "had" a neighbor who's pigs just ate him. I kid you not. I have a whole different opinion on pigs these days. But yes.....KARMA, its a wonderful thing!

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  10. wow. What an experience. I think your strength and confidence always get you through.

    (Good writing here.)

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    1. Thanks Myrna! I'm way behind on my writing. I'm blaming the audiobooks. I have much to learn but I'm not beating myself up over it.

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  11. The only way his firing would be true poetic justice would be if he were fired for refusing to stuff a pair of socks down the front of his shorts...

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    1. Susan.... THAT WAS BRILLIANT!!!! sock in his jock, sock in his shorts.... damn, wish I thought of that!

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  12. What goes around, comes around, as they say. Now he's the one who is fired. Take THAT, Bobby V!

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    1. I'm sure he'll be fine. What I like best is that it doesn't appear he was respected by his players or coaches. And from where I'm looking, I understand why :)

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  13. You tell 'em Monkey!!!! Thanks for visiting me lately! I appreciate it! Trying to keep up with school and life here.

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  14. I AM a baseball fan, I AM huge RedSox fan, and I DO have hard feelings for Bobby V. I knew it! Your story only confirms what an a-hole he is and why the team was leaded to a dissaster. Kudos to you and your bravery! Shorter shorts he said?? Something else was short, I bet!! Lol!!

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    Replies
    1. LOL!!!!! ohhhhhh I have no doubt! :) still chuckling over that OJ. Thanks for reading and commenting!

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  15. Wow, pardon my language but he sounds like a douche-bag.

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Thank you for encouraging my JOY of writing. By reading and commenting you are feeding my soul, stroking my heart, and in the end...making me a better writer.

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Thank You For Encouraging My Joy of Writing
greenmonkeytales@live.com

Shannon E. Kennedy

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Photo by Joan Harrison