Wednesday, January 4, 2012

What Monkey Do?

OH ...... I almost forgot.  It's that time of the month, the first Wednesday of January. Time to confess my insecurities as a writer. This month I'm worried I will lose my ability to turn words into a story that you will find uplifting, laughable, inspirational, and/or entertaining.

Other INSECURE WRITERS, can be found HERE at the Insecure Writers Support Group.
I have found more support here than anywhere else on the internet.

Now, without further ado, it's onto WHAT MONKEY DO, a post about procrastination.

Monkey still not writing.

Instead Monkey Do:
Blog reading

Soon I'll get off this pig and start writing. (is it just me or does this pig look like he's smiling)

For now, I'm waiting for inspiration. Not sure where it will come from. Typically my best writing is fueled by passion. I'm either pissed off or heartbroken.

Does anyone want to break my heart or piss me off?

CONFESSION:  Yesterday I watched 45 minutes of  The Newlywed Game and was highly entertained by the hair styles and the commercials. My mind is quickly turning to mush.

On the UP side, I managed to get "the song" (you know THE SONG, don't make me say it, BABY MONKEY) out of my head for an entire evening last night thanks to Sub-Radar-Mike.  Mike is married to his music.  Love the heavy bass, electronic fusion featured here. Makes me want to light things on fire and spin them around.

My goal (not to be confused with resolution) this year is to spin fire at the base of the man on burn night with the Portland fire conclave. If that sentence didn't make sense, just let it go....

Did I tell you Mr. Cooked (the husband) shaved his face!  I haven't seen his chin in over 2 years.  I am still a bit shocked by it.  He looks like a completely different person.  

He went from THIS, featured here with Fanana Wam, on New Years Day (52 degrees in Connecticut - and they say global warming isn't real) 

To THIS...


And he'll be shocked when he discovers I put his topless face on facebook and on my blog.  
Monkey rarely asks first AND Husband rarely asks first. 

Case in point... 

Imagine how shocked I was when I found THIS at our front door.
A gift from Mr. Cooked to US.

Once again, 
It's time to play...


The rules never change, I'm allowed three guesses.

GUESS #1 - Did you buy it online? 

GUESS #2 - Did you buy it after midnight? 

The cat is clearly confused but I'm pretty sure I know what it is, even without the third guess. 

GUESS #3 - Were you drinking when you bought it? 

Based on this information and the fact that the box was labeled FRAGIL, 
I knew I was the proud owner of a LAWN JOCKEY.

Sure he's cute but we don't have a lawn.  We live in a condo (maybe he forgot that)

I came home a few days later and found a jockey of a different color.  

Mr. Cooked painted him gold.
At that point, I tossed in the towel and accessories him.  

What every jockey needs - a blindfold, a merkin, and a lantern.

I have no idea how to end this post. 
Clearly YOU see this is Monkey ME procrastinating. 

Tomorrow I will hold on tight. 
Tomorrow I will write
I will 





  1. Oh, sadly I think you musn't be my friend any more. I have no inspiration to give you, I look to you for inspiration. I'm empty and haven't even been writing on my blog, facebook or anywhere. At least you're writing here and it's lovely writing at that, and interesting pictures of Mr. Cooked.

    Your creativity is simply resting, mine seems to have vanished. But I'm resuming my blog at least. Other writing - I don't know if even to keep trying.

    Glad to be back reading you again.

  2. MYRNA!!! I was just wondering about you~ look forward to your writing as well.

  3. Oh dear, so there's your lawn least you're accessorizing him well. You need a tupperware container full of pennies to give to Mr. Cooked.

    Insecure writer. Interesting...that could be me, depending on the day. Sometimes I think I'm brilliant. Who cares if it's just me that things so, yes?

    Keep writing, friend! I love it!

  4. haha nope not an inspiration to spare, I can't find an single one at my lair and LOL a lawn jockey, the catgave a look like things were getting rocky.

  5. WOW! Thanks for the laugh. I really needed that today. The thing I found that works the best when I have the same problem... just write. Even if it's crap. The longer it is that I write the harder it is to make myself do again. Good luck.

  6. Even when you're procrastinating, your writing is great! Keep writing, rhino, no matter what!

  7. that's a great jockey - If you get tried of the red merkin (I don't want to know why you own one) you could just put jockey shorts on him - pun fun.
    Hey blogging is not procrastinating. There are readers depending on you.

  8. Curious. I'm new to the multiple sites available (pardon me...pain spiking)...sorta back now. Anyways, a friend set me up at word press, but I am very impressed with you site here. Part layout and design. Part your words over the years. As I Edit and transfer stories from Tribe, what/where do you recommend? KK

  9. KK, I like both word press and blogspot. I have blogs on both but I think blogspot is more user friendly. I'm a freak so I tweaked the hell out of my site - stripped it down to the bare minimal to put a focus on my writing. It's all a learning process. Let me know when you're blog is up! xoMOnkeyME

  10. Read like a story to me. Mr. Cooked looks YEARS younger without the facial hair. And love the lawn jockey. Maybe he should be holding a pink flamingo.

  11. Hahaha I think one of my favorite things to blog about is procrastinating... Surely some of our most brilliant ideas occur when we are not looking for them?!

    There's a video on youtube of Elizabeth Gilbert (a la Eat Pray Love) talking about a less stressful view of inspiration... it's worth checking out. If I didn't entirely agree with it, it is always inspirational to hear inspired people talking about inspiration, right?

    And the video stands on it's own, even if you weren't a huge fan of EPL... as someone who also quit life a couple years ago and backpacked around foreign countries, I read her pretty harshly, but she is still a very talented writer, and very familiar with all writerly angst and insecurities.

    Here's a link to it if you have like 20 minutes to spare!

  12. Yeah sorry that link is a wreck... may just be easier to google it, haha

  13. Maybe you could use the jockey on the deck? He could stand guard. You could make him clothes so he doesn't get cold. :)

    I will be writing tonight about winning the lottery.


    It's a serious piece. I'll most likely post it on Friday or Monday, whenever the mood hits me.

    Thursday as you know is Truth is Thursday... which was written on Tuesday, just because.

    Forgive me, Tony started ripping apart the sunroom. It's down to studs, insulation, and much mold from the water damage. Mold which I have killed and erraticated with a lot of bleach. I think the fumes are not good for my brain activity. And, it appears that plaster dust is not gluten free. ICK.

  14. I make myself write, something, every stinkin' day. I have to or I will lose my mind.

    Good luck!

  15. Oh, Shannon! I love these funny posts of yours! And here's how I look at writing/procrastinating/having or not having inspiration....We all suffer through it. I consider Blogging as Writing! I'm a better writer today, because of blogging! There! Go feel better...for at least a couple of days! :)

  16. Hi Shannon,

    Dude-ette, you crack me up - not the other way round!

    I feel your passion everytime you write, even if you think you're procrastinating.... sometimes we just gotta let the musings muse, so we can save the energy for the major posts!

    PS... OMG... a lawn jockey for a condo... you and Mr. Cooked seem like a GREAT fit :)

  17. I'm REALLY laughing my arse off right now. The pig started it, the Newlywed game continued it and the lawn jockey almost made me pee my pants. :)
    Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

  18. I had a few days off from work and I wrote everything I felt I needed to write, and I soon found myself FREE and able to waste time.

    I was going to watch television.

    I didn't get to the "Newlywed Game". Went out of my skull crazy with boredom, and eventually went back to writing.

    Happy New Year!

  19. I swear to daMONKEY I had NO idea this post was funny.

    THIS is my life.

    You just gave me the courage to blog about my husbands shoes.

  20. What a cool gift! I love lawn jockeys, but it's a little sad he has no lawn to jockey, but what are you going to do? Funny post!

  21. At least it wasn't a leg lamp!
    And were you watching the old Newlywed Game from the 70's? You should watch a little of the old Match Game as well.
    And sorry, still trying to get to all the posts. Thanks for participating!

  22. I always have trouble getting back to writing when I'm away from it for to long. I feel resistance and then I procrastinate like crazy--like today.

    Hope you're writing again soon!


Thank you for encouraging my JOY of writing. By reading and commenting you are feeding my soul, stroking my heart, and in the end...making me a better writer.

Thank You For Encouraging My Joy of Writing

Thank You For Encouraging My Joy of Writing

Shannon E. Kennedy


Photo by Joan Harrison