Tuesday, April 6, 2010

ANTI SOCIAL NETWORKING - CONFESSIONS OF A CRAZED BLOGGER

It’s time I come clean - lay it all out on the line.  My name is Shannon, aka Green Monkey, and I have a Blog Addiction Disorder, which means...I'm BAD.  It's more than a virus, and worse than spam. I am a full blown Blog Aficionado.


I crave followers, fans, comments and tweets. When I get one, its like a shot of adrenaline and I ride that instant gratification high as long as I can.

Currently, I'm in a state of hyper paranoia.  I’m convinced no one is tweeting me, I don’t have enough followers and I’m jonesin' for more fans.

I spend countless hours tweaking and promoting my blog.   I google the words "green" and "monkey" over and over again, so that it will appear higher on the search engine list.  If I'm NOT on page 1 - I'll pout.

Attention grabbing headers, soothing sidebars, buttons, badges, gadgets and widgets.   Formats and photo’s - upload, download, crop, resize, reposition, add text, and adjust the hue.   

I am so focused on my STATs that I hit myself often and watch the counter climb.  Page loads, unique visitors, returning visitors… my mood is in sync with the rise and fall of tri-colored scales.

Facebook, Twitter, Blogfrog, Blissdom, SITS tips, secrets and share fests. 

My site, your site, I’ll follow you if you follow me, one good comment deserves another...

Bloggers that specialize in "Blogging Tips" will tell you to “build and nurture your community" but developing my blog base now overshadows sleep, exercise, sex and any real time/face to face human interaction. (notice I still have time for wine and cheese)

Last week, I cut my hair extra short so I’d spend less time primping and more time posting.

I’ve stopped reading bloggers simply because I enjoy them.  I now read and comment on anyone I think will comment back.  It’s exhausting and half the time... I’M FAKING IT! I’ll read half a post, or reword some else's comments (pure plagiarism).

I feel like I showed up late for a race -  injured and dehydrated, and I'm desperately trying to catch up.  

Blogging...like it or not, is HOT.  Blogging...is BIG business.

There are currently over 10.5 million blogs on wordpress alone and we're all struggling to get "real time."  

The new hype is something called "PuSH" which stands for
Pubsubhubbub, a realtime protocol designed to speed up RSS.  To us Big Time wanttabe bloggers - reading this makes our palms sweat and our hearts palpitate. 

Established, highly read, and closely followed bloggers are the internet junkies version of the ultimate martini.  One Part Vegas Entertainer, two parts Pulitzer Prize winner, and a fresh slice of Hollywood hottie - clinging to the side.

Surprised?  Think I'm delusional?  Well, it is a well googled fact that blogging has out passed Porn, 3 to 1! 

But don't despair, Porn blogging is on the rise (no pun intended).  A site called "Boing Boing" targets "wife swappers, exhibitionists, whores, and people who need to hide their porn."  One word people...BRILLIANT!  

The largest, by far, bloggers are stay at home mommies.  NOT that there is anything wrong with THAT - the LAST thing I want to do is piss these ladies off!  They have both hands on the keyboard and they're holding all the power.  

They blog about everything from poopy pants to party favors.   They are united in weight loss, quilt making, The LORD (yep, even "Mr. Big" is in on it) flower arrangements, recipe's, craft projects, menopause, bankruptcy, divorce, and infertility.  

There are even blogs that rally in support and prayer of the terminally ill, as was the case of  Layla Grace, a two year old little girl who recently passed from Neuroblastoma - a rare cancer that develops from nerve tissue in infants.   Her family chronically her illness and their pain in addition to raising awareness, funding and support.  

Her death was announced in an online Twitter post to 42,000 of her fans. 

A lot of good comes out of blogs - a lot of healing and emotional support.  But, be warned - there are wild packs of trolls who target vulnerable bloggers.  You'll recognize them by their negative comments.  I do my best to ignore them (realizing that they too crave attention) or, if I'm feeling freaky, I'll dowse them in positive, glowing energy.  Hey, trolls move along - go get your own blog!

For many bloggers, their main motivation is making money. This is so NOT me. My master plan is to try and get YOU to read ME.  Ultimately, I want to update my bio to include “published author.”  The way I see it, if it worked for Elizabeth Gilbert, who wrote Eat Pray Love and Julie in the movie Julie, Julia then it can work for me too!

This race to become a Big Time Blogger has taken me way off track.  At the start, I was a woman in search of her true voice.  A woman who made the conscious decision to believe in herself.   But lately, I’ve become more focused on getting noticed then being a writer.

It's time to go back to where my dreams began. Back to that moment when, at the age of 12, I stood in front of my dresser mirror and said for the first time, out loud, “I am a writer.”

I am a writer.  I write random thoughts and short stories.  Some are funny, some are sad, some are mildly entertaining and some are masterpieces - if only in my mind. 

I write for the pure pleasure of writing, regardless of whether someone reads it, or comments on it, or publishes me.   I am still, and always will be, a writer. 



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Green Monkey Tales © 2010 Shannon E. Kennedy


photo's courtesy of Google image




To read more about the battle of Layla Grace: laylagrace.org 




18 comments:

  1. Good heavens, girl. If sex and sleep are suffering, this just won't do. Thank goodness you hadn't lost the wine and cheese, yet. Now, get back to the sex, right away. (I'm sure Mr. Cooked won't mind) Your following will come. Don't fret.

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  2. I have just satisfied your craving, I am now a follower of yours.LOL I love to write too...mostly poems and journalling in art journals that I have created...I guess I subscribe to the idea that writing is more a solitary occupation.Thanks so much for stopping by and following me.I have throughly enjoed reading your blog today!
    Micki

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  3. Can I say that I LOVE YOU! Freaky I know..right. But I do I can't help myself. First your blog name kills me. My oldest son has Aspergers..not tugging heart strings...hes a pip. His fav color forever is green and his current OCD word is monkey...hes also into frogs and just face it your green monkey looks like a Frog.
    2nd reason you are now my new BFF is I love your post!! That is so me, I'm a SHAM but looks like my posts are on the same line as yours ...just not as good.
    3rd reson I'm now stocking you, I love to write...not to make money on my blog..but to move people...support people and just cause I love to write and love when people want more of it...lol which shocks me frankly.
    Love you love you follow you every where...yes freaky but your on line and sometimes the freaks come out and find you.
    Nice to meet you BFF.
    found you on Sits blog frog..did I say I love you?

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  4. HELP!!! I'M just took a quick peak at my latest post. I'M SO HIGH I CAN'T DRIVE HOME!!! 2 NEW FOLLOWERS AND 3 kick ass comments! I'M DOWN RIGHT DELIRIOUS... TAXI!!! WAITER!!!

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  5. Loved this post! There's some truths here that we all recognize. It always make me happy to see you comment, but I admire the fact that you want to get back to the thrill of writing and thats where your energies should go!

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  6. Thanks for the laugh. I must admit (clear throat)... I've become a bit obssessed latey as well. I think we all are to some degree. I haven't joined twitter yet- still a bit overwhelming. I found you on SITS and had to peek. I'm hooked. I'm going to be your newest follower. (wink, wink)

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  7. yes--- you hit the nail on the head! it is overwhelming and sometimes I just need to walk away. The addition of Blogher ads made it worse for me because the more traffic = more money. What a great article! going to pass this on

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  8. Thanks Mama and Alicia :) 2 more followers! life is good, damn good

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  9. This post is funny because it's so true. I think we all want to be writers on some level and we get carried away with all this other "stuff" that really matters less than the writing itself.

    Please remember, when googling your own blog, to log out of your Google account. It tracks what is relevant to *you* and ranks that higher for *you* and if you log out you can end up seeing totally different results.

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  10. WHATTTTTTTT!!! Thanks for feeding my addiction :)

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  11. okay...so I clicked on this "Customization based on signed-out search activity is disabled" does this address THAT which you commented on??? :)

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  12. LOL. This was thoroughly entertaining. I think I have a mild version of the BAD. I am hoping that it is a phase that will fade away in a couple of weeks.

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  13. Whats cool about childhood dreams is that they never leave us. They may get dusty from time to time but we always get to go back to them. You made that decision to believe that you were a writer when you were 12 years old and I have no doubt that you will follow through on that... you already have!

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  14. This is a very interesting blog and so i like to visit your blog again and again. Keep it up.

    Sharon

    http://www.bukisa.com/articles/271402_breast-cancer-in-men

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  15. Great post. I started blogging to have something for ME to do and I really love it. If you are finding it to be too exhausting - try reminding yourself why you got into it in the first place. I find myself trying to compete at times and then step back and remind myself that this is for me and not for competition.

    Happy SITS Saturday Sharefest

    Devan @ Accustomed Chaos
    http://accustomedchaos.blogspot.com

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  16. Your Friend FlickaApril 11, 2010 at 4:06 PM

    Wow, Shannon, great post. I love it when you spill your heart. Now, about that addiction...I had no idea it had come to this. Do you think there is rehab for BAD?

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  17. I understand where you are coming from. Remember why you write, it is for FUN!! Remember that F-word? You are talented and when I read your post you sounded like what my head thinks too. It is addicting and I try to stay focused on why I write...because it is a wonderful high and fun to express myself. Keep up your great work, can't wait for your book!

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Thank you for encouraging my JOY of writing. By reading and commenting you are feeding my soul, stroking my heart, and in the end...making me a better writer.

Thank You For Encouraging My Joy of Writing

Thank You For Encouraging My Joy of Writing
greenmonkeytales@live.com

Shannon E. Kennedy

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Photo by Joan Harrison