Thursday, November 10, 2011

BUSTED!!!



It took close to two hours for them to complete their "inspection."

I insisted Miss Pegged not be present. I had no idea how ugly it was going to get and I didn't want her to see me grovel, plead or cry.

They arrived on time with a strict directive - inspect EVERYTHING.

As I mentioned in my last post, never in the 52 year history of the company has their been an inspection, let alone a surprise inspection.

Is my state issued license clearly displayed on the wall?
Do all guards have a current security guard license?
Are all guards registered with the State of Connecticut?
Have all necessary forms, photo's, fingerprints, and fees been submitted?
Was the State notified of all terminated employees within 5 days of their termination?

? ? ? ? ? ? 

Am I a master procrastinator?  YES 
Am I methodical and well organized?  NO 
Am I capable of policing myself?  NO 

....and this is why I have Miss Pegged.  She's brilliant like that.  

Did I pass their directives with flying colors?  YES
Thank you Miss Pegged.  

Once that was complete, my guard uniforms were inspected to make certain they were in compliance with State regulations. THEY WERE

Then each employee's personal folder was inspected to make certain it included a copy of their guards card, drivers license, social security card and a completed I-9 form.  THEY DID

I was asked to supply a copy of my company polices, guidelines, and specific post orders.

EVERYTHING was not only in order, but surpassed the standards.  I am "the example of how a first rate security company should be run."

Was I carrying my security license - a card that proves I am a professional in good standing with the State and the federal government?

Why, yes YES I AM!

Every two years I am asked to submit the proper paper work, fees, fingerprints and a current photo. After review, I am issued this card...


Wait... there is a problem.
Is that a current photo?

Well...no. I've been resubmitting the same photo for the past 12 years.

Well...there is a fine for that.

Wonder if there would be a fine if I submitted this photo?


Am I annoyed by this? ABSOLUTELY NOT
It could have been a lot worse.  Had I not hired Miss Pegged I would have been in serious trouble.

On the eve of my inspection Miss Pegged mindfully neglected to inform me that the penalties associated with not following the States directives is up to a year in prison and no more than a $5,000 fine.

The only positive outcome of a year in jail would be that I most certainly would have completed my book.  Well, as long as Miss Pegged was policing me.

And speaking of books, I'm way behind in my daily word count and is it just me or has everyone except ME published a book?  Even the kitties beat me to it.


And those clever kitty's have even developed an APP for that.

  
As the officers were leaving, one of them turned towards me, smiled and said, "Your father should be very proud of you. You're doing an excellent job running the company."

What a wonderful gift he gave me. Carrying on the family legacy, proudly, is very is important to me. I also appreciate the simple fact that I am an excellent judge of character.

After a well deserved lunch, I informed Miss Pegged that no matter what, I'm taking her with me.  If its kittywigs we're making, she's in charge of putting the wigs on the kitties or collecting fur balls for the REAL kittycat hair collection.

And because you "can't con a con man" I'm certain this pretty kitty is NOT a natural blond.



xoMonkeYme

WANT MORE KITTY CAT?  

Here is a heartwarming tale of a cat's insatiable lust for proactive dancing.  


Special Thanks to Jesse Fowler for planting the kittywig seed in my head. 
And Jelly Jessicali for leading me to the kitty dance.  


16 comments:

  1. (I probably could have posted a more profound comment, but I try to go with my initial reactions...)

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  2. LOL...... why thank you KatyDid! :) I'm breathing deeply today! yippy for me :)

    there really is a gift in everything. some of them are hidden.

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  3. Nice work! But.....somehow, I just can't picture you grovelling, pleading or crying ;)

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  4. Mykee... its amazing what you'll do with the work fate of over 50 employees (but yes, you've pegged me perrrrfectly!)

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  5. Yeah for Miss Pegged.

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  6. LOVE the un-naturally blonde kitty!~!! BIG belly laugh here!!!

    She's so, fearlessly rocking that look!!!!

    MG

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  7. A year in jail and $5,000? Just a tad steep if you ask me...

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  8. I just read this and your post below it. Fascinating stuff, Miss Shannon! I'm really shocked that such a "surprise inspection" needs to be performed on a security business. Seems like the "inspectors" have run out of more important things to do

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  9. Congratulations to you and Miss Pegged! It was wise to send her away. You know how she likes to flash her panties. We wouldn't want the nice officers to think they were being bribed. So, do you have to get your picture updated right away? I think the Jesus-ear-muffs shot might work. --Sam

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  10. I have to agree with monkeygurl...big belly laugh @ the un-naturally blond kitty!!

    Do any of these cats smell a rat? It seems some rat with a grudge may have set you up. If I were a PI in high standing such as yourself...I would find out why the hell a surprise inspection happens after 52 years of never happening before!

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  11. Wow! This posts reads like a novel. Surprise, Suspense, angst, humor, and...a happy ending. Great read!

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  12. I'd like to think I pay great attention to detail, but I would only be kidding myself. I remember a lot of detail, but the paperwork....fagetaboudit. Congrats. Especially after you told them they couldn't come in without a warrant. You'd think they'd have to find something.

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  13. I would welcome the yar in jail if it meant I could get a nap. Seriously, I am that tired and it's not even 6pm.

    But they make you clean toilets in prison so, maybe I should just find a quiet place to rest.

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  14. Congratulations! I can't believe you get fined for having an old picture! And those wigged cats seriously freak me out, but I did get a laugh out of your description of the last one! The curtains definitely don't match the rug on that one!

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  15. Sounds like Ms. Pegged needs a special kitty treat for bailing you out. And your planted seed of "Kitty Wigs" is cracking me up. :)
    Jules @ Trying To Get Over The Rainbow

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Shannon E. Kennedy

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